Regrets...The Mad Hoosier changing his stance??

In the past, I've said that I don't have any regrets in life, and I stood by that when I did this post. At the time, I had read Rocketstar's blog when he questioned why it was so bad to have regret, based on the general definition of feeling sorry or remorseful for a previous action.

I tried to argue that it was the definition that people may take issue with when determining if they had regrets or not. I stated that people took regrets to mean that they'd change something in the past...which they know would change their current lot in life. I even argued that if I made a different decision (returning home to finish college instead of finishing in Toledo, Ohio) that I would have never met my wife, had three wonderful kids, etc. So I don't "regret" that decision. It was just an example I used, but I felt it could be translated into any decision/action (as many percieved regrets are negative, while my example of returning home to finish school wasn't necessarily an example of a negative experience).

I think I'm starting to change my stance. I still look at regrets in the larger issue sense...more in the life-altering sense. But now, I think of regret as going to the heart of a different issue...doing the right thing.

Unlike my wise friend, Rocket, what I didn't see then what I see now, which is that it's ok to regret and be remorseful of bad decisions without betraying your current place in life. I even think it's ok to say you'd do that something differently. Because you're acknowledging that you did something wrong, you're learning from a previous mistake.

In the end, you simply can't go back and change that previous decision, and merely wishing you made a different decision, then, isn't betraying what would have possibly changed in the present.

There's one specific issue in my past that changed the way I think of this, and it definitely comes down to doing the right thing. It was a life-changing event that I regret, and I wish I would have done it differently. What I did was wrong.

Maybe it's because it was a life-changing event, but I've actually found it to be somewhat liberating to admit regretting the decision I made. I've taken more accountability for the decision I made, and learned from the situation. I don't feel as though I've betrayed my current lot in life, even though it probably would have turned out differently, because I can use the wisdom, or lack thereof, in that decision to possibly help my family or others in the future.

I still adore my family and wouldn't change where I am in life. But what I did was still wrong, and if I can admit and regret doing the wrong thing, what kind of example am I setting?

The big thing is learning from the decisions you regret, request forgiveness if necessary, and don't dwell on the decision or how things may have been different.